A Piscean’s personal platform

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While you’re far away dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause Id miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I’d still miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing

Lying close to you feeling your heart beating
And I’m wondering what you’re dreaming
Wondering if its me you’re seeing
Then I kiss your eyes
And thank God were together
I just want to stay with you in this moment forever
Forever and ever

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause I’d miss you baby
And I don’t want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I’d still miss you baby
And I don’t want to miss a thing

I don’t want to miss one smile
I don’t want to miss one kiss
I just want to be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just want to hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time

Don’t want to close my eyes
I don’t want to fall asleep
Cause I’d miss you baby
And I don’t want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I’d still miss you baby
And I don’t want to miss a thing

Don’t want to close my eyes
I don’t want to fall asleep
I dont wan’t to miss a thing

19 more days till the final war of the year…

60% of marks allocated…

Stacks of notes and practices awaiting…

Can I secure my scholarship? Can I make it?…

Haven’t passed with flying colours this year..

Can miracle happen?

I’ll try my very best….and the rest…I’ll leave it to God

Inconfident?? What to do? What else can I do?

Spare me for this time ok? I beg you…I have had enough………….

Just another ranting…i doubt when will my head explode. No one will ever know how depressed I’m now. All my hardwork were being paid of by undesired results. All my hopes seem to be vanishing[as if I ever carried any high aim,I really lost my mind!!] I don’t know what to do now[STUDY! STUDY! STUDY!....but how about CCA and PW?]

Currently one of my most extrovert Project Work teammate seems to be quiting school. That means I most probably will loss one hand for my project. And worse, all the remaining group members are more introvert. Furthermore, seeing how all the team mates work, I can foresee that I will have a very hectic life for the rest of term 3.

These days have really traumatised me. I seriously FAIL my maths with a very ugly mark. Well, inverting the digits will be the results that I used to get. Sigh, so much for the efford that I’ve been putting on Maths. I am too lazy to analyse all my results here[too embarrassed perhaps...]. Long schooling days + choir stuffs + sickening results + Project Work + GSC Project Work + loads of tutorials + School Practical Assesement + revision = ???[What is such life called?]

For a girl like me, who has no ambition and not sure of her interest, it’s really hard to find reason to strive on. Now I study for better income in the future. Just for $$$ [sorry. I know that this is a wrong mindset but I'm really exhausted. The seniors are having a much tougher life. I wonder if I can take this huge challenge]

This is the 1st time I feel so devastating and weak. I need force to push on but who can provide me with it. I do not want to bother my parents over these anymore as they have had enough worries on me. As for people around me, I could not find any suitable one to speak my heart out. I jealous over them. I admit it. Because they do not have to study like mad as I am but they obtained better results than me. If my problems still remain unsolved, how I survive?

Who can help me? How to continue with life? I don’t know…….

Well, it was not out of my expectation…but I know that it will be worse when the results are announced.

Day 1-H1 General Paper

Ok, points and arguments could be presented quiet smoothly and fluently. I was quite worried [mild] because I usually scored very low marks for GP although i thought that I might have written a well piece of essay. Being able to answer the questions in time,I thought that this would be a good and renewed start on the very 1st day of the term. But I never knew that IT WAS JUST THE BEGINNING OF A SERIES OF NIGHTMARES!!!

Day 2- H2 Chemistry

It used to be my best and favourite subject but things were just against my odds. Limited time triggered my nervousness and nervousness engulfed my rationalism. I couldn’t even solve redox problems…and there was no time to review the questions that I could not answer. Very disappointed….

Day 3- H2 Mathematics (HELL)

One and only description- FAILING FOR SURE

{so much for all the afford I have made, so much for all the practices I have been doing,but at the end……..left 2 questions completely BLANK–wonder how many marks were thrown away already… }[studied so hard =didn't study at all...I swore that very night was the moment my nerves breaking!!]

Day 4- H2 Biology

For math. dono how to do so got plenty of time; For bio, knew how to do BUT DIDN’T HAVE ENOUGH TIME!!! This really drove me mad!! i left 3 structure questions blank just to complete the essay part behind. I knew the ans but time was not allowing me to crap anymore…..

Day 5- H1 General Studies in Chinese

Ok la. Nothing much. But I don’t have confidence that i will score well. General paper is really difficult to score. But I wondered if my essay was on the right track…HELP~~~

Ya, this was the exciting week that I have experienced. There will be more interesting events coming up–when I receive my results

Man, I nearly gave up pushing myself after the stupid math paper!!!

Just ranting in the middle of the night, when it seems like the whole world is tumbling down on me. I’m striving under the pressure of….COMMON TEST!!!~~damn exam-.-

I hate Maths, maths hates me.

We’re forever enemies!

With a great hassle of summation to do,

Broke record in failing you!

________________________________________________________________________________

I love Chem, Chem loves me?

At least we’re like family.

With a low enthalpy between you and me

Our bond will be steady.

________________________________________________________________________________

For Bio, don’t ask me,

If you are my cup of tea,

Hope those jargons never mutate my brain gene

Interest will be grown on thee.

________________________________________________________________________________

GSC， 不容易，

大小国事须警惕，

议论文的写作技巧还未精，

趁此短期加把劲！

________________________________________________________________________________

GP’s last but not least,

Deal with all the fallacies.

Don’t have high level of thinking and language,

No hope in excel in it.

Does the rhythm sound familiar?? Well, it just struck my mind out of sudden and I somehow felt that I should spare my head from suffering for a moment by composing another short blog.

Oh no, time’s not allowing for moaning!!!!

Now STOP DANCING YOUR FINGERS ON THE KEYBOARD

Time to resign from a BLOGGER to a MUGGER

Better finish the Bacteria topic by Tonight…the very night~~~~

……..

The mail that I received today didn’t really give me a shock, but it intensified my frustration and helplessness as well as reminded me that time is running out. No way turning back!!!

Þ BBCCD

What is this??

This is Shameful.

This is Hilarious.

This is Idiotic.

This is Terrible.

This is a piece of SHIT…

This is all I can achive from a life without shopping, movies, pop musics, TV and story books. Is that All?

What else can I sacrifice? My ± 5hr sleeping time that has already caused my body systems to go haywire? Moments when I lament all my problems to my mother?

People say : "Stop grumbling. Actions speak better than words. Shut up and continue with your STUDIES!!"

I know…Have you seen what I’ve done in these months? When did I last put down the academical hassle, take a good rest and enjoy life? Mummy said: "You had always never failed to be the cream and now is the time for you to learn…" But, I’m not satisfied seeing all my hardwork being paid of by such poor performance…

Time management…I doubt if I can change my school’s schedule

Memorizing technique…I doubt if I’m so creative to apply the skills

Ahhh…..all the excuses. No wonder nothing can be achived…

Common test is around the corner. I know I can’t improve much but a little is enough to please me now, just for now……

Still blogging, Go and study laaaaa!!…

《不能说的秘密》

冷咖啡離開了杯墊
我忍住的情緒在很後面
拼命想挽回的從前
在我臉上依舊清晰可見

最美的不是下雨天
是曾與你躲過雨的屋檐
回憶的畫面
在蕩著秋千 夢開始不甜

你說把愛漸漸 放下會走更遠
又何必去改變 你說過的誓言
你用你的指尖 指示我說再見
想象你在身邊 在完全失去之前

你說把愛漸漸 放下會走更遠
或許命運的簽 只讓我們遇見
只讓我們相戀 這一季的秋天
飄落後才發現 這幸福的碎片
要我怎麼撿

Nice song..nice movie

Left rooms for thoughts,imagination and reminiscence

Hmm…this should be his best movie ever

The reason of me saying this is…..(lol,refer to my profile XD)

I heard that his newest album will be released soon

Anticipating his surprises now,haha

Frankly, his last album did disappointed me a little

I could not find that feel in all songs

Unlike November’s Chopin

or I shall say that all my memories were kept within the rhythms and lyrics of most of his songs in that album

Ah, no time for all these sentimental issues,exam’s around the corner

But, thus far we have come,

It’s unbelievable that our bond still remain until today,

although many unexpected incidents have happened throughout our secondary life.

Together, we went through the ups and downs of life[but actually you all went through with me,I admit that i don't really know you[how silly am I? How uncaring am I? Or rather say that I'm not observant enough]

And i knew that i did not say a word on your special day

It was….aikx..I don’t know either

There’s a repulsive force that prevent me to do so

If it’s not you all, i wonder what my present life would be, who am I now,haha

I’ll stop signing in myself from next month onwards……[doing the same thing like what i did before PMR]

There’s a slight possibility that I might not be in Malaysia next year

Depends on how well I perform on this very Sunday

In this year, we seldom chat,not to say meeting each other

Maybe we have reached our station,you’ll take this road, I the other

Time drifted…i wonder what will be our future

There was once[years ago...] when I thought our story was over..but you continued it

But thing will not be the same in future

Never mind…..

Whatever will be, will be

In future,

Please take with you the recollection

Of all that we did in common

True love is too rare

But a good friendship is even more so

Remember this quotation???

I saw your webpage

The glory of success is radiated from your pic

Congret, good deed, keep it up

I never underestimate your potential and strength

You never let me down

Each time i saw you in the newspaper,i admire your leadership skills

School level, zone level, state level,national level….

what were they but your stepping stones to be 1 of the best in this world?

I’m so proud to be your friend,to be a friend of a future leader of the world

Those were not only good news for you

but also a consolation for me

As my sight was never wrong

You are always you

I’m telling this with a gladful sigh

You will always be a role model in my life

the most special homo sapien that i had ever met

Again…

Congratulation and salutation and celebration

Dear,don’t be afraid. you’re good in your own ways,you know that you’re right even though all people in the world are against you. You analysed the whole scenario,didn’t you? You put yourself in others’shoes,didn’t you?You belief that there’s justice somehow, hold on to that,don’t give up. God’s always with you. HE knows what’s going on.No matter what you’ve been accused on, be strong. Let no tears falls,no guilt or sadness fills you. Nothing is needed to be paid by your precious tears as you know that you’re innocent.Nothing is more important than knowing that you’re in the right track, despite others don’t.

Can a simple word of ’stupid’ that slipped from your lips accidentally when you’re frustrating on something causes everything to be blamed on you? Should you bear all the lecturing and accusing sight because of a mere ‘S.T.U.P.I.D’??? What if he really did something wrong to you?? Should he not be bearing the consequences of his act just because the other party scolded the world ’stupid’? For what i know, ‘Stupid’ is a taboo for my parents. Despite my brother really did something wrong to me,whenever i scolded him ’stupid’, my parents would not check up what’s wrong and immediately pointed their fingers to me. Well, i know that it seems offensive to scold a person ’stupid’, but you sometimes just can get very irritated when  your siblings do something that causes no good to you,or rather say that they’re trying to get you into hot soups for what they have done.Well, i don;t mind if people make mistakes. Ya, all of us do..but what if a person is trying to harm you? They are obviously doing something with bad intention? Are they deserved to be forgiven and freed from facing the musics? Can merely a word of stupid (hey, he should be thankful that i never scold him with foul languages) wash away all his sins and the innocent party is to be blamed? As a conclusion–A word of ’stupid’= he’s right, you’re wrong.Hello, what kind of world I’m living in???

Well, this is not the 1st time i face with such situation. There are been a number of same casES happening around me. Not only my brother, they involved my friends. For what i know, I’m pretty sure that someone (maybe some people)is stabbing me from my back,creating all the rumors that make the whole world think that I’m a bad person.It’s just that i keep an eye closed and never want to talk about it or be a stubborn and keep analysing whether it’s your fault or my fault. Because if i do so, I’ll be wasting my time and energy. I will be the only one who is living in a world full of anger and devastation while others are having their great time enjoying every minutes that are granted. You may think that I’m exaggerating my story as if siblings won’t really harm each other,after all you  all are children and it’s normal for siblings to quarrel sometimes………SHUT UP! Enough for the blind accusing again,I have enough for that! People can make mistakes and they will be forgiven but if i ever take a wrong step, whole world will be tumbling on me and i will be hated.

Not appreciative??—I always appreciate but people think that i take things for granted. Let it be lo, what can i say, i can’t control your mind ya….

Too Selfish??–i did put myself into your shoes. I changed but you can’t blame me when emotion takes control on me sometimes, right?? There’re people who are more aggressive and irrational than me. How come you never blame them?? I changed, what about you??

Think too much–Ya, I’m. If i don’t think, I’ll be offending the whole world, that’s even worse right? Perhaps I’m thinking too much now. Unchangeable nature. But so what if i never commit crimes or hurt you?

Wonder why human always could not see through the veils of hypocrisy and reach the truth? Well, I’m certainly not blowing my own trumpet and think that what I’ve done all along are correct in all senses.Well. If i really don’t mind what people think of me, why should i post this on my blog?Hmm.. everything comes to a square one despite all those grumps and complains.Things will not be better after all.However, there’s a message that i would like to give all of you..

””Dear parents and friends, keep your eyes wide all the time. The truth does not depend on what you sense by your sensory organs.  A truth can only be a truth if you sense things with your intelligence and rationalism.””

dear, believe in yourself. You are actually better than anyone else in all means. Be confident.Stand up and face the challenges. You’re actually incomparable….

Hi, 1st time composing a post…..